Perhaps I could not straighten out my thinking if one of my best friends didn't tell me this. She said that,"You will view men differently if you are more relaxed and confident." Enlightened by her words, I came to realize that though a modern and independent woman I am outwardly, I am very traditional and conservative inwardly. I still think women should be men-centered, listen to their opinions and ideas while ingore their own.

　 Please don't take me wrongly, I am not a housewife yet. I just think those are what a perfect woman should do and should do them well. However, as I give second thoughts to this matter, I can't help wondering whether my girlfriends who got married are husbands-centered. Here, there is a premise that we should not overlook: my girlfriends all have jobs (though not careers) and work hard. Sometimes family affairs are sure to influence work, which can not be prevented, but they all stick to their jobs any way. They don't depend on  their husbands to such a extent as I imagined partly due to their husbands' salaries free them from worries so that they can manage family affairs well. They also spend their own money for children, husbands, even themselves. They are happy when husbands are around, otherwise, they go shopping or take out children. When something is too heavy for them to carry, they take taxis; when they are tried for taking care of children by themselves, they are willing to turn to family for help.

　　 Then, why am I so sure that a woman is the happiest only if she revolves around her man? ZhangAiling once said that she had bought everything in her house, even a nail and she had never been taken care of by HuLancheng, which made her feel sorry as if something had lost. A women loves to be doted on and to depend on a man, or she will feel sad for not being loved. However, as to me, I feel more and more stronger that to depend on someone does not necessarily make you feel good. Tenderness has nothing to do with your delicacy and men's strength. Tenderness, which means consideration and concern, is of equal importance to both men and women.

 In fact, being independent is happy. Women, who rely on others and make others the source of  happiness and pain are actually under a lot of pressure, for their  selves will be overwhelmed by the expectation and demand from someone else. I once read a story about" what do women want best". The answer surprised most people: taking full control of their fate. To men, it is nothing. While to women, it is everything.

　　 I  am quite relieved at my friend's words. I don't want to think hard how to get a man's love and care any more. Nor do I compare myself with those so-called happy women and change myself like crazy to attain that goal. If a man can only be satisfied by me giving out too much, he is not worth me to spend the rest of my life with him.