Kids who avoid trouble often have good problem-solving skills. You can help your child develop these skills before difficult situations arise by following these three steps:
First, help your child look at the situation or problem.
- ·Teach your child to focus on the entire situation rather than just part of it.
- ·Summarize what happened in simple, specific language.
- ·Ask your child if your summary of the situation is correct.
Second, identify the options-the different ways your child could respond to the situation.
- ·Let your child list both good and bad options.
- ·List no more than three options.
- ·Suggest options if your child is having trouble coming up with them.
Finally, decide on a solution.
- ·Make sure that your child knows the possible outcomes of each solution.
·If the decision doesn't need to be made immediately, let your child take some time for additional thought.
Sometimes children choose options that parents don't like. In general, if a decision won't hurt anyone and is not illegal or contrary to your moral or religious beliefs, then let your kids make the choice and learn from their decision. If a decision would be harmful, illegal, or immoral, you should clearly state your disapproval, and let your child know the consequences of making that choice. Then follow through.
译文:
提高孩子解决问题的能力
经常逃避问题的孩子有个通病，那就是缺乏解决问题的技巧。你可以根据以下3个步骤，帮助你的孩子提高这些技巧：
第一步，让你的孩子学会面对问题
教你的孩子重视整件事情，而不仅仅是事情的一部分。
总结比较容易发生的状况和特别的话语
询问你的孩子，你对情形的描述是否正确
第二步，明确选择――你的孩子可以应对情况的不同方法
让你的孩子把好与坏的选择都列出来
列出的选择最多不要超过三个
当你的孩子自己找不到方法的时候，你要为他们提供一些选择方法
第三步，明确解决问题的方法
确定你的孩子了解每种方法可能产生的结果
如果不急着作出决定，让你的孩子花些时间独自考虑问题。
有时候孩子选择的东西父母不喜欢。通常，如果决定的事情不会伤害到别人，不触犯法律或者不违反道德和宗教信仰，那么让你的孩子自己作决定，让他们从自己的决定中获得启迪。如果作出的决定会对他人造成伤害，犯法或者是不道德的，你要反对他那样做，并让你的孩子知道这样做的后果。然后重新再考虑如何去解决问题。